Friday, January 22, 2016

Even We Have Our Bad Days

I often feel like the special needs community makes a big deal about the parents being "Super." They juggle appointments, therapists, medications, equipment and the way the Internet makes it seem, we all do it with ease. But what you don't see are our bad days. The days where we just want to cry (and sometimes do!). The days where NOTHING goes right. The fights, the meltdowns, the screaming, the crying, the spills, the leaks. Even we have our bad days.

Yesterday was one of those days where NOTHING went right. I felt like an awful parent. I felt like I wanted to go hide in my room. And the thing was, it actually started really good!

Little Man got up and after ten minutes of watching TV (yes, I let him watch TV in the morning before school to help him wake up), he wanted breakfast! He was then ready to go to school by 7:15 in the morning! This NEVER happens. Who was this kid? We were out the door by 7:25 because I had to get Princess up. He was one of the first few at school and there was NO line to drop him off. I totally thought it was going to be a good day. I was wrong.

It started when it was time to get Princess dressed. See, Princess can't really get herself dressed or undressed and she's almost 3. There are things she should be able to do, but can't and things that I believe she can do but is so flipping stubborn that she won't. She will be receiving OT twice a month to help with this. So I decided to start before we have OT in place because there is a plan in the way things are done while we are AT the therapists. The main therapy will happen at the beginning and end of the session. Princess will take off her clothes, get to play and then put her clothes back on to go home. I know, sounds weird, right? But we were advised to get a leotard or swimsuit for her to wear. (Luckily we found her a short sleeved and long sleeved pink leotard at Walmart in her size and didn't have to find a dance store!)

Well, I wanted to start early with this "getting dressed/undressed" thing so we're not taking HALF the time getting undressed and HALF the time getting dressed and then there's NO TIME to play in between. (Playing is the reward for getting undressed.) So we decided to make her a sticker chart because she seems to be motivated by stickers.

So, back to yesterday. It was a NIGHTMARE getting her dressed! It literally took us 45 minutes! We almost didn't go to school! There was screaming, crying, bribery, everything. I felt like the WORST mom in the world! But we did manage to get to school. And she got to share her stuffed Everest because she was the helper. But beyond that, I think school was just too much stimulation for her yesterday. See, it's "Circus Week." So this week, we have a bunch of circus themed games in every room. The kids can have popcorn for snack. We even have a mini bounce house! And they are given tickets and if they want to, at every station, they can trade their tickets for prizes! Well, this was Princess's second day of preschool this week and I think after the first day of "go where you want, no schedule," the second day was just too much for her. Granted, I was able to sneak out and go grab a mocha because I felt so bad and she was hiding under the slide playing with her tickets. She wasn't interested in trading in the tickets, she just wanted to play with them. And then when I cam back, she was more interested in the things we usually have out, like the light table and the puzzles, than the games. She primarily stayed in the room where there were the least amount of kids. And when we went outside to play, she just wanted to sit on my lap and snuggle. Then she didn't want to leave!

When we got home, we watched some "Paw Patrol" and she seemed back to normal. We went outside and blew bubbles and she even let me use my new leaf blower. She went and sat on the steps into the house while I did it. And when we picked up her brother at school, she definitely seemed like everything was okay!

Then after Little Man was home, she started "denning." She hid herself under the dining room table, under the blanket, and then under the trampoline with all of her stuffies. Yeah, she was having an overwhelmed day, even though her brother wasn't being loud or anything. She took a late nap and then when she woke up and I was making tacos for dinner, MeMe had to hold "Tinky Nee," her giraffe, because he didn't like the noise the cheese grater made. She hasn't done this in a long time. She had figured out what that noise was and would usually come and ask for cheese.

When I got her into bed, I hoped that today would be a better day. So far, it seems to be. We skipped gym because it's been raining all day. And otherwise, we've just had a calm, peaceful day with puzzles and games. SO much better than yesterday!

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  1. If there weren't bad days, we would take good days for granted! And pushing through those bad days makes you "super" in my book! :)

  2. Oh poor little! Bad days are part of EVERY mom's life. Yours has more pressure but you are not alone! We are all here to support you and remind you that you are doing an AMAZING job!!

    1. Thanks Raewyn. Yeah, our bad days seem to be a pretty rare occurrence, but when they happen, they are AWFUL!

  3. Oh no! We definitely all have our bad days and no one is super woman. Sounds like you handle it well though!

    1. Thanks Pam. I try. It's not always easy, but we manage.


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